This ministry was birthed through a desire that God placed on my heart several years ago to help women who are carrying the incredible burden of shame and guilt of a past abortion. Many women live in secrecy for years fearing what others would think of them if they knew their secret.
A Mother's Story:
My abortion experience was almost 30 years ago at the age of 25, I was delighted to discover that I was pregnant. Happily married and the mother of a beautiful 5yr old daughter, I thought I new baby would make my life perfect. Quickly my new found joy turned to despair when I found out that my pregnancy and my baby might be less than "perfect". I was filled with fear. Uninformed and without godly counsel I aborted my baby the next day. I believed the abortion would bring relief and peace. I was very wrong. The shame and guilt that followed led to a life filled with anxiety, anger and depression. Although I appeared to have it all together, on the inside my heart was aching.
In the midst of those dark years I was again faced with another abortion decision, this time not my own. I neglected my precious daughter at a time when she needed me the most. A young teenager, searching for "love", my sweet little girl became pregnant. I not only drove her to the clinic, I paid for her abortion. Even though I knew it was wrong and I was very sad, in some bizarre way it seemed like the right thing to do. Adding to my guilt and shame, I buried this secret along the memory of my own abortion, vowing to never talk about it.
I developed a new "normal", and continued to hide my shame denying that the abortion affected me in any way. God in his Sovereign love and mercy had a different plan for me. Several years later, when I was least expecting it, something wonderful happened. I was 43yrs old and even though I had spent all of my life going to church and knowing "who" Jesus was I realized that I had never made Him Lord of my life. I did just that and committed to live my life for Christ. It was a joyful exciting time but also a time when the memory of my past abortion surfaced everywhere. It was like neon lights on a billboard. I know now that God was just loving me and allowing me to deal with an area that needed healing. At that time, eager to know the word, I joined a women"s bible study. Still not knowing that the abortion was the root cause of so much pain in my life, at that study God introduced me to 2 women who literally transformed my life. It was like God saw me wondering around trying to find my way and He picked these 2 precious ladies to help me. These women gently encouraged me to join their study and led me on a healing journey. The journey was amazing and it changed my life forever. By surrendering my secret, I found true peace and healing. I found myself forgiven and set free. It was during this time that God planted a seed in me and gave me the desire to assist others on the same healing journey. I believed God was going to use me in this ministry. One woman in particular that I wanted to see healed was my daughter. I knew she too suffered from the pain of a past abortion and it broke my heart. I knew God wanted to her healed too. My Joy and HOPE were renewed. I knew that someday God was going to use us a team"
You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will praise you forever. Ps. 30:11-12